November 6, 2023
Question:
A friend of mine lost her husband recently. She's paid the bills over the years, so she knows all that, but she wasn't really engaged in the discussions around their investments. Can you give a few places where she can just start?
Answer:
This is hard. The first thing I would say is don’t make any big decisions unless she absolutely has to for at least six months, maybe longer.
However, I would recommend that she start with two documents:
A NetWorth statement - list out on a sheet of paper or in a spreadsheet all the accounts they have. This would include savings, checking, brokerage, IRA's, and 401K. Then list any outstanding loan balances. This centralizes her assets and liabilities so she can see the big picture and know where "stuff" is located.
Cash flow statement - this one is a bit harder sometimes, but I would suggest a notebook with a page for each month or a spreadsheet with a tab for each month.
What is the regular income and what are the regular expenses? When do big expenses hit (i.e. taxes, insurance, etc.) - write those in the lower right-hand corner of the applicable month.
Is there a shortfall ever? If so, you know it and can ask for some guidance on the best place to pull it from.
Tell her not to be afraid to ask for help, but to be cautious about making decisions. It's a proven fact our brains are a bit in the "fog" when we are grieving.
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